8th
Forget ‘Bull Durham’
I’ve recently begun to get really interested in minor league baseball. And with all the info out there on the internet, it’s pretty easy and fun to follow your team’s prospects — in more ways than one.
For example: any Cub fan who follows the minors has gotta be pretty excited about Tony Thomas, a 22-year-old second baseman from Florida State who’s currently hitting .356/.430/.632 for the AA Tennessee Smokies. But as much as TT’s hitting has got me feeling good, what I really love is his twitter. Let’s take a look at the life of a minor league baseball player, shall we?
Going to hooters to drink some beers and lick on som legs…… I mean wings4:58 PM May 2nd from twidroid
Lick on some legs at Hooters? Oh Tony, that is some “saucy” innuendo right there, my friend. I like it.
Tenn. Smokes goin out with huntsvill girls. Ps I love them southern girls they r crazy9:20 PM May 2nd from txt
Hey, I’m not one to judge. Minor league ballplayers have been more adept at scoring ladies than scoring runs for as long as minor league baseball’s been around, right?
Stipclub with hooter girls… Tryin to live the dream!9:27 PM May 2nd from txt
Wait, so you’re going to a strip club with Hooters girls on your arm? Okay, that’s kind of crazy, but it’s also kind of awesome, so hey, man, go for it. And I love that he’s using “tryin’ to live the dream!” in reference to strip clubbin’ with Hooters girls, not making the big leagues — very clever.
But here’s where things start to take a turn.
I want to make things right and show her how much she means to me!12:15 PM May 3rd from twidroid
Wha…..wait, what?!?! You’re telling me you spent four hours getting drunk at Hooters, took a bunch of Hooters girls to a strip club, publicly broadcast all of this on twitter, and you have a girl you really care about? Oh Tony……no.
Miss my boo11:30 AM May 4th from twidroid
DAMN IT TONY WHAT WERE YOU THINKING WHEN YOU WENT OUT WITH THOSE HOOTERS GIRLS!?!?!?!?
I excited to see the most gorgeous girl in the world today who is also my best friend @sweetkadence6:01 AM May 6th from twidroid in reply to sweetkadence
Awwwwwww take him back, @sweetkadence! He made a mistake with those Hooters girls! He won’t do it again, he swears! Can’t you just forgive him?!?!
Epilogue: The Tennessee Smokies played a double-header against the Mississippi Braves last night. After presumably spending his tweet-free off-day with @sweetkadence, Smokies leadoff hitter Tony Thomas turned in an inspired performance, going 5 for 8 with 3 doubles, 1 triple, 2 walks, and 3 runs scored.
I couldn’t make this stuff up.
